Saturday, August 4, 2012


I've unfriended a second person on Facebook. It's uncharacteristic of me to put my foot down and basically tell someone I don't want to be involved with them anymore, but these are extreme times. There is a fight for civil rights going on in this country and I will NOT tolerate people who don't understand that denying other consenting adults the right to marry whomever they choose is pure, ugly, unadulterated discrimination and makes them a bigot. In case anyone disputes the definition of the word bigot, here it is, thanks to the on-line Merriam Webster dictionary:

Definition of BIGOT
: a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance

So, those who find themselves saying gay people should not be allowed to marry, I am not interested in being friends with you. What if I were gay? (I'm not, but just for the sake of argument.) You wouldn't be friends with me, or not a true friend, anyway, because you wouldn't want me to have the same rights you have. What if one of my children turns out to be gay? You would shun my child or deny my child rights? No, I'm sorry, I don't want to be friends with you anymore.

Oh, you say, but my RELIGION tells me it's wrong to be gay. Well, SO WHAT!!! Your religion is not the government of our country and you DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO SHOVE YOUR RELIGION DOWN ANYONE ELSE'S THROAT. I don't have to believe in your religion, and I don't have to live by your religious beliefs. Ask the people in Afghanistan how living under religious rule worked out. Not too well, I'm afraid; it wasn't exactly a happy place under the Taliban. If you think being gay is wrong, then don't live that way. (And if you think that, and you are gay, then I feel for you since you are living a lie.)

I also believe being gay is innate, not a personal choice. There is one simple reason I believe that, and it's this. I am not attracted to women and couldn't make myself feel that way. Men make my little heart go pitter pat. I like men. I like looking at men. I like the way the men on the US Olympic swim team wear their bathing suits waaaaaay down low on their hips; yowsers!! I love my husband; he's a hunk. While I can appreciate health and beauty in either sex, looking at a lovely woman is like appreciating a piece of art. I can see the beauty but it's not something I'd want to cuddle up in bed with. I also think about how it would be if the situation were reversed and being gay was the norm and heterosexuality was somehow deemed aberrant- would I be able to force myself to be gay? Nope; not going to happen. I could partner up with someone and be friends but the physical attraction wouldn't be there. That's why I think it's so ridiculous when the religious types go spouting off about "they can change, it's a choice". No, it's not; you love who you love and to do less is living a lie. I won't ask that of anyone.

So get your religion and your bigotry out of my legal system. I do not believe in your version of religion and I don't have to. It's a free country, although it's getting less and less so every day, and all consenting adults should be free to love as they choose and marry as they choose.

There is no room for debate on this one. It's all or nothing; no agree to disagree. I can debate until the cows come home about a lot of other topics- taxing the rich, how to implement health care, how big government should be, how to bring down the deficit, and so on, but if you are against same sex marriage and equality for all, then you are a bigot and I don't want to be friends with you. I don't have room in my life for that. I'm taking a side and taking a stand and proud to do it.

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